I Shared My Grief Publicly and It Cost Me Sales
This summer, I made a choice that every business guru would probably tell me was "bad for business."
I shared my grief publicly. Raw, vulnerable, in real time.
And it cost me sales.
But here's what it taught me about building a business that actually lasts—and why I'd do it again.
What happened this summer
If you followed along, you know.
We lost Duncan's dad. Two weeks later, my grams died. And my grams was like my mom—I lost my mom when I was 11, so she naturally took on that role. She was my motherly figure.
I'm not going to get too deep into it here because otherwise the tears will come. But this grief completely knocked me off my feet. I was not myself. I was heartbroken. You can't predict how you're going to move through loss. You don't know what's going to happen to you. You don't know how the people around you are going to move through it.
It was just... sad. Really, really sad and challenging.
And because I'm me, I shared it.
I posted Instagram stories from the floor at my dad's house. From the airplane. I wrote captions about what grief actually feels like when you're trying to run a business, trying to mom, trying to move through your own process while holding it all together and letting it all fall apart.
I let my community into the messiest parts of my story.
Because that's how I process. It's how I connect. It's how I build relationships. It's what gives me purpose—to share stories and allow people to feel less alone.
Why I'm wired to share
In my behavioral science report, I'm high dominance, high extroversion, and fast pace.
That's my wiring. So when something happens in my life, my natural response is to share it out loud. To speak it. To not sit on it, not wait—but to immediately move through it by bringing people in.
I don't need to take time to sit with things privately. I need to talk about them. I need to share about them. I need to move through them in connection with other people.
It's my strength. It's why so many of you are here (which I'm so grateful for). And it's what fuels my creativity, my business, my life.
So of course I posted about my grief. Of course I brought you into it. That's how I'm designed to move through the world.
But here's what's important to understand
Not everyone is wired like me. And that's completely natural.
If your behavioral wiring is different—if you're high in conformity, which means you prefer clear boundaries between personal and professional life... if you're lower in extroversion, which means you don't naturally seek external connection through sharing... if you're slower pace, which means you need time to process before you speak...
Then you shouldn't be forcing yourself to tell stories in the moment.
Maybe you don't share your process out loud. Maybe you keep things to yourself and share the high-level learnings way later. Maybe you watched me this summer and thought, "Oh my god, I could never do that." Or even, "I don't like that she's doing that—it makes me uncomfortable."
And you know what? That's okay.
You're not meant to share like me. You don't have to share like me. Honestly, none of us need to be sharing at all. We get to choose.
What I want you to really hear
Some of the most successful entrepreneurs I know—people making millions with millions of followers—are not building trust through vulnerability.
They're building trust through consistency. Through expertise. Through results. They share their income, their strategies, their quick takeaways. They're not sharing their personal lives. And they're building a completely different type of connection.
So the question is never: Should I be sharing more like Robyn? Should I be more vulnerable?
The question is: What feels authentic to me?
What feels authentic to my voice, my pace, my way of being, my communication, my energy, my way of processing?
That's the question.
Here's what actually happened when I shared my grief
The beautiful part:
I had really deep, meaningful connections and conversations with people. Women sending me messages saying, "Oh my god, me too. Thank you for making me feel less alone. It's so inspiring to see you move through this with such power and still use your voice."
I built real trust with my audience. I showed up as a whole human, and they were able to show up as whole humans in return. It was beautiful. It was supportive. And even though so many of these relationships exist on the internet, I really consider so many of you friends now.
The only reason I can consider you friends is because of this level of vulnerability. This willingness to be seen.
Here's where it got hard:
Sales slowed down. Big time.
My messaging got confusing. Was I a grief coach now? A life coach? A branding coach? Was I even selling anything?
A lot of people unfollowed me. I lost almost a thousand followers as I shared my grief story over the summer.
I wasn't showing up with clear offers. I ditched my strategy completely—and that made space for the personal vulnerability, but a lot of people got scared and ran for the hills.
This bitch used to teach me how to build my brand and now she's crying on the bathroom floor. I'm out.
I didn't make a million dollars this summer.
But I feel like I built something way more valuable.
What I actually built
I built trust by being myself.
I built a tighter community than I've ever had before.
And honestly? I weeded out the people who aren't here for the big, hard, messy conversations. The ones who are triggered by vulnerability or just want the strategy without the human behind it.
Those aren't my people anyway.
I want to have the real, hard, true conversations about what it's actually like to be the human behind the business. That's what I'm here for.
Not every season is meant for growth
Here's what I'm really understanding the longer I spend in this role:
Not every season in your business is meant for growth. Not every season will be your biggest sales season. Not everything leads to immediate revenue.
Some seasons are meant for surviving. For eating buttered noodles while you cry. For sitting on the driveway because the tarmac feels warm on your skin. For journaling through the hard things. For healing. For learning. For just being a human who isn't attached to results or outcomes.
And that season will build trust with your community—if you allow yourself to really be in it. If that's in alignment with your wiring.
It is safe to share. It is safe to be seen. And yes, there will be a direct impact on your business.
But if you're prepared for that, the outcome on the other side is a community that will hold you. Walk with you. Shout your name from the rooftops. Buy everything you offer—because they know who you are.
In today's world, if you can build that kind of trust? That is so much more powerful than selling strangers a $7 offer and never seeing them again.
Get curious this week
How do you process? Do you know how you want to share and show up online? Do you know what your natural wiring is?
Are you forcing yourself to share more (or less) than feels natural? Because you think that's what "successful entrepreneurs" do?
What season are you actually in—growth or survival? And are you honoring that?
The truth
You can't build a sustainable business on someone else's strategy. You have to build it on your wiring.
Whether that's sharing everything like me, keeping clear boundaries, or something in between—what matters is that it's authentic to how you're designed to operate.
My way works for me. I'm sharing what I learned in my own process. But there is a different way that works for you. And that's what I want to help you discover.
Not every season is for building. Some seasons are for being human.
And that's exactly what makes your business sustainable in the long run.
Go deeper
Get your Identity Report — Discover how you're naturally wired to communicate, process, and show up—so you can stop forcing someone else's version of "authentic."
1:1 Brand Strategy Sessions — Build a brand and content strategy that actually honors your wiring.
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